Ring of Fire

Yes, I know it's been over 2 weeks since my last post, but it is difficult for me to try to be funny. Friends at work say I'm pretty entertaining, but that's in person.

Well, I thought I would have to go to N.A. meetings to get off the Lidocaine. You know..."Hi, I'm Bob and I have a drug problem." "Hello Bob!" (I don't know why there is a big gap in the text here, but it won't go away)
As it turns out, the problem took care of itself. I developed a reaction to using it. When I was in itching hell, I'd put on some more lidocaine. It would take about 15-20 minutes for the itching to subside, and I'd be good for a couple of hours. Well, I got this rash, and it itched like hell too, so I thought, "I'll just put some on it too." Within a couple of days, I had the worst case of rash on my ass that I could imagine, and the itching was worse than ever. On my side, I'll bet my ass looks like a hippo mouth with chapped lips! I'm still only getting about 3-4 hours of sleep a night because of the itching. Not only that, but I have rash starting where I've never used lidocaine. I have an itchy ring around my belly button! WTF is up with that?!

Went to the doc today, and I now have a cream for the itch part of where the sugery was..., one for my cheeks, and another one for the other independent rashes. He says it looks like I've developed a mild infection. Great, just fucking great! The good part of all this?
In between hot baths (3-4 a day), and itchy spells (more than 3 or 4 a day), I can't sit long because it irritates the itch, so I go out to the garage and work on my airplane. I'm hoping to be able to crank it up sometime next month and fly soon after that!

There's a ton of work to do on it, but I'm on a mission.

Star of Bethlehem

I'm realizing that my recovery is taking as long as the doctor said. I figured I would be back to normal in a few weeks. Although I have periods of normalcy, this itching is about to take me down. I've become a lidocaine junky. It says on the tube to use every 6 hours. HA! After 2 hours it was itching so bad, I was almost wishing for the intense pain I woke up to. So I was using the lidocaine as needed.

Well, the swelling hasn't gone down like it should, and the redness is getting worse. After one of my tub episodes, I was bent over looking in the mirror and thought, "My ass looks like a Christmas ornament, it could almost be the star on top of the tree". Upon furthur inspection, the way the swelling is and how the redness is making a halo around it, I decided instead it looks like the Star of Bethlehem.

Mind now going into overdrive... how could this be marketed on ebay? Not many guys can say their ass looks like a heavenly object. I do know quite a few women that have those, however. It would be easy if it looked like the Virgin Mary, or Jesus himself, I'd even take Willie Nelson or George Bush, but this isn't a piece of toast or pancake that I can sell. Pictures probably wouldn't sell very well as most people would think they were photoshopped. Being in the true Christmas spirit, I thought about standing on top of the house with a nativity scene below, and a spotlight on my ass hoping that it would inspire some wise men to lavish my humble abode with Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh.

Alas, one of the neighbors would probably call the cops and although it probably wouldn't be proven to be indecent exposure in a court of law it could, however, be considered at that point a career limiting move. Besides it's cold out there.

No matter what, it's not a pretty picture.

"Are you suffering from that painful, rectal itch?"

That was an actual line from a Preparation H commercial some years ago. I have a new definition of rectal itch. It will wake you from a dead sleep, and you jerk the covers off and get to the bathtub as fast as you can. The doctor prescribes water as hot as you can stand, which lights the itch into afterburner. It seems to me that when you have swelling, you should have cold on it, but what do I know.
So, I have this little step stool I perch an elbow on, put my feet on the sides of the tub (one side is almost non-existent, however) hold my nutsack up and feel the painful rectal itch go into overdrive as the hot water rises. After 15 or so minutes of this, the itch subsides, and you use your foot to hit the drain.
If you accidently slip with the nutsack, the commotion is similar to a quarterback fumbling the ball on the snap. It's all assholes and elbows and sounds like you are trying to land that 400 pound tuna into your little boat and there is a shark feeding frenzy going on.
This itch can be worse than the pain, and the demerol does nothing for it.
My new daily routine:
Bath, try to get really dry as I'm afraid I'll get athlete's foot, jock itch and the equivalent of diaper rash. Don't sit too much as it'll get the itch going sooner. about 2 hours later repeat the process. Day and night. Sometimes I just want to run a curling iron up my crack. I've been thinking about trying to find a drug dealer for some coke suppository. Somehow I don't think my prescription plan is going to cover that one. I'd go to the witch doctor if I thought it would help.
I hope you all are having a better time than me.
Dr. appt. tomorrow. For once I can hardly wait.

Piss Bag Hell

I'm alive 1 week after surgery. That's the good part (subject to change).

I was more than a little apprehensive about this whole thing to begin with. I go in for surgery and wake up an hour and a half later in the most incredible pain imaginable. They ask you how much pain you have rated 1-10. With 10 being you feel like you'll pass out. I'm no stranger to pain, but this was the most intense pain...I think most of the other times I was in shock, which helps.
Being a fan of the movie, "This is Spinal Tap" , I say 11, but you'd think the tears running from my eyes might be a little hint.

Big shot of morphine...20 minutes later, no change in pain. Another big shot of morphine and still no change. The Dr.s and nurses are looking at me and can't believe I'm not floating. Now a big shot of Dilaudid. Finally the tears stop.

If a doctor says we have to operate near your tailbone, rectum, colon, or anything like it down there, say thanks, but no thanks. Goto the nearest costume store and rent a dog costume. Put it on and see if you can find a vet that will put you to sleep. That is the only humane way to do this.

I don't know what they are called, but they go on the hand mixers to mix cake batter etc. Those metal 4 bladed twirly things. They have a small version of one of those and that's how they do the surgery...just run it up until they get what they want.

After I get home, I have to sit in a hot tub of water. That works out pretty well as the demerol is wearing off, but the hot water makes it not so bad waiting for another dose.

I'm home, and can't pee. I try everything cold water hot water straining until my whole insides were going to fall out my ass and NOTHING! Not even one dribble.
I go to the ER and get a catheter. Normally I don't mind pretty nurses fondling my crotch, but I was in pretty bad shape Since none of them wrote their phone number on my hand, I guess they weren't very impressed. Mild depression starts in after that little episode.

2 days go by. Awake for an hour asleep for 3. Everything is going to schedule, except for the catheter thing, until I forget to close the drain valve. Get out to the garage and drag the shop vac in to try and get all of it out of the carpet. Finally get it all cleaned up, like I really needed to do all that. 'Bout 15 minutes later a buddy comes by to check on me, feed the cats and dog . PERFECT! Why couldn't he have been here in time to at least bring me the shop vac. He did get me more water and carpet cleaner and put the vac away for me.

Day 3. I have become an enemagician. There ain't no way in hell your body will let you take a dump. The put sponges, tools, rivets, scotch tape, and a large briar in there, and no stool softener in the world will touch that. Doc says fill the bag up with warm tap water, then fill you up and wait 30 minutes. 30MINUTES?!?! I couldn't wait 30 seconds. Every thing came out but the briar. Back in the tub to get over the trauma.

Day 4. The Briar has got to go, but after some more enemagic I find out it's not really a briar, but a large orange traffic cone, and it's coming out square end first.

Day 5 I get the catheter out! YAY! I'm not tethered anymore! 10 hrs later I'm back in the ER for another catheter.

Now I have a low grade infection, and feel I have to pee all the time, but it's a direct line out. Doc says that'll go away soon. Not soon enough.

A normal adult bladder holds about 750ml before it'd pretty painful. They got 1930ml out of me. You know there is something up when the nurses tell their cohorts to come by and see this. It was about 2 shot glasses short of a 2 liter bottle.

Catheter comes out this Thursday. The Doc wants ME TO DO IT!!! I have to do it early so if there is a problem, I can get there withour another trip to the ER..... I just might have to find that dog costume.

This is probably way too much info, but I'm thinking about doing this every vacation.

Well, gotta go deal with another traffic cone.

UPDATE: The traffic cone is about the size of a candy corn.... I don't know what they did down there, but from now on I'm on a smoothie diet.

TIP: Hamburger smoothies just don't cut it.

I have a chromosomal translocation

In other words, an abnormal growth near my tailbone. It's been there for a long time, but after a misstep on a ladder, I fell backwards on it and it got bigger and very sore. From the size of my pinky fingernail to bigger than my thumb.

Having surgery on Monday the 5th, and they tell me I'll be out of work for 6-8 weeks!!!!

I have plenty of sick time built up, but I'm not excited about it.

A buddy told me "People have been telling you they were going to ream you a new asshole, and finally someone is going to do it."

yay


The hospital is going to ream me one, the doctor is going to ream me one and I'm sure the anesthesiologist will ream one too.

Not that I'm a prolific blogger, but I'll probably be down and out for a while. I do hope I'll be able to keep up on reading my favs.

Kansas isn't in Kansas anymore

Here goes for the second try on this post....

A buddy I work with is the penultimate Kansas fan...you know, Kansas the band. Yup, they are still around and are as good or possibly better than ever. Back in the Late 70's-Early 80's I lived in Atlanta, and worked with a guy who built street rods, etc. He hired me to help him with a 1937 Chevrolet coupe. We were building a hot rod for Dave Hope, bass player of Kansas. Those were the days. Dave would come by and we'd hang out, and I'd get to go to parties and hang out with the band.


Marty said we were going to the Kansas concert in Greenville, SC, and although I'm not a fan of crowds, I went. Had a great time. I mentioned to him that the band just wasn't the same to me (of course I hadn't seen them since probably '82), and I miss the original guys.
















Dave was very proud of the fact that "Kansas is the only big name band that has all the original members!"....Dave left about a year and a half later. I understand why he left, and if I had stayed around Atlanta (had to go racing), I'd have needed to leave too. Way too much partying. It's amazing to me that any band can stay together for the long haul anyway. Too close, too long, too much.


The musicianship is, as always, amazing. Although I still miss the original band, this group is very "tight", especially considering how difficult their music is to play.

I sure would like to talk to Dave again. He is an ordained minister now. I'm glad he has his life together and I wonder what happened to the coupe. I never took a picture of it, but it sure was fun driving around in it.

Billy's (the guy I was working with) girlfriend, one time called me "Mr. Coupe", and Billy corrected her, saying it's "DOCTOR COUPE". The name stuck for quite some time, and The Monolith album (before public releasse) was signed; To Bob, "Dr. Coupe", thanks for your help on the car. Best Wishes from Dave Hope. It was also signed by Ehart and Walsh. That album was stolen along with several hundred others along with my stereo and car.
I'm still bummed about that.

I looked at a picture of Dave on the internet, and damn if he didn't get old. I guess I had better go look in the mirror. Fortunately, I'm not as old as him and look much much younger...no, really!

I just try to regain some of my youth sometimes, and that concert was one of those times. It brought back memories of the band getting ready for a tour, and Dave would come by and say, "We sound like a garage band trying to do Kansas songs." It would only be a couple of days later that he would say they were starting to sound like Kansas again. It was only after that, the practice sessions would be open for viewing (unless you were special, like me).

Blue Skies

Looking out the window today reminds me of the sky when Ferris Bueller looks out and says "How could you possibly go to school on a day like today." Today's sky doesn't even have that one cloud yet.


It is much better than Friday when I went to the Sonex Fly-In in Crossville, TN. I had a blast. Although my Sonex isn't ready to fly yet (still a long way off), I flew in the Cessna 152 Texas Taildragger. The sky looked ominous although Crossville was clear and about 15 miles west of me was reporting better ceilings. I took off and found a hole in the clouds to go through. There were a total of 5 different layers of clouds. It was pretty amazing, well amazing after the scary moments. I was going to fly direct, but there were build ups of clouds that went through the layers. I was at 4500 feet and had to go around a few of them. One, near Asheville, was particularly large and I ended up in a white out situation. Thinking I'll break through in a second, ok maybe any time now, OK maybe now, Ummm maybe I should turn around, one more second...Ok turning around. I came out where I went in and headed around the other way, and they were everywhere.....so I headed Southwest towards Georgia. It would add a little time, but the mountains I'll have to fly over are lower and they are reporting better weather there too. I found another hole in the coulds and went up to 6500 feet and when it got bad, I went up through another layer to 8500 feet. It was not really bumpy at all, and the little rain I hit washed the bugs off the windshield.


The lower layers stopped at the mountains and I could finally see the ground sometimes. It was a little more relaxing so I could get a picture or two. Coming out of all the weather, I wasn't far from my destination. It was a fun and exciting 2 hours.




I had a blast, and one of my friends had painted part of his plane with Kandy Tangerine. I have a new favorite color now. I think painting the whole plane this color would be too heavy, but it sure looks nice.

It was nice renewing old friendships, having cocktails at the motel with my buddies, and I was a camera plane for the Saturday morning Dawn Patrol. I hope all the pictures of the other planes flying by turned out.

Now back to work on my plane full speed ahead. I'll have to fly less so I can buy some more of the things I need to finish my plane. Might even have to save up for a Kandy Tangerine paint job.

Crappy Weather

Well here I am at work, working...no...really. I looked outside and we are under an ominous cloud cover. What's that? Blue sky! There is a hole in the clouds!
Maybe, just maybe, I'll get to fly to Tennessee tomorrow to the fly-in there. The weather doesn't have to be perfect, but where I'm going is reporting 6000 foot ceiling. As long as I can get a couple thousand feet over the ground without being in the clouds, I'm good to go.

This year there are some workshops that I hope will be very informative for me. Canopy and cowling fitting as well as an electrical workshop are offered. I'm just at the point where I will be fitting my cowling, then the canopy and of course the instrument panel (electrical).

So I hope I don't have to drive there. It's so much more fun to fly and less than half the time.

I just hope when I retire, I have good enough health and enough money to fly.
I need to make a coast to coast trip in an airplane I built with my own hands to honor my father. In high school, we would go from coast to coast in his airplane over the summer just before school started, and I always wanted to fly alongside him in my plane. I couldn't muster up enough money or drive to do that while he was alive so I'll go it alone. I'm sure there will be tears along the way as I fly to and over some of the same places I remember as a kid. All in all we made 7 trips across the USA (no not all of them were when I was in high school).

I have to make at least one more trip.

Triple Tree Aerodrome Fly-In

I flew to the First Annual Triple Tree Aerodrome fly-in last weekend. It was great. I took off Thursday to go, and would have taken off Friday, but had to work. This is an unbelievable place just South of Woodruff, SC. There is a 7,000 ft grass runway that is lighted, a huge hangar with some really nice big model airplanes as well as a couple of antique airplanes. It's a nice facility with a patio and outdoor fireplace, showers for those camping and even has a control tower for the fly-in. Way cool! There were 150-200 planes there on Saturday, and a pretty big crowd.

Next weekend I'm flying to Crossville, TN for the Sonex Fly-In. I went last year and although I'm not flying my Sonex (since it's not finished yet), I will fly there. An hour and 45 minutes in the air is a whole lot better than 5 hours driving.

It'll be nice to see the friends I made last year and catch up on all the new technologies and tips from the other builders. Plus, I only will work 4 days this week too!

Flying above a carpet of cotton

This morning I checked the weather because it was supposed to be clear, and it said few clouds at 1 thousand three hundred (above the ground).

I looked out the window and it looked relatively clear (even though it was still dark). So I decided to fly. On the way to my friends house to get the plane, I noticed some thin fog in the valleys. Not really a problem, so I called a bud to get a ride from the airport to work and got the plane ready to fly.

It was just getting light and the sky was just gray. Again, not really a problem. About 500 feet above ground, I was in the clouds (the plane is equipped for visual flight, not Instruments only flight). Snap decision...do I continue or turn around and land? I'll be out of them in just a second and the destination is pretty clear. I focused on the instruments and kept climbing. Sure enough a minute or two later I was above the clouds. Still can't see much as the sun hasn't officially risen. I climbed higher than normal and followed the GPS track towards work. 20 minutes into the flight, I still haven't seen the ground. I was beginning to think I'll be flying around a while... Once again, not a problem as I have 4 hrs of fuel before I run out.

I see a little bump in this beautiful but boring layer of a cotton 'carpet' which must be the mountain about 10 miles from where I'm going. On the other side, there is a big hole in the clouds so I know I can at least come back there and go under the clouds if I need to. I know where the airport is, but still can't see it. I can eventually see parts of the ground and find another hole and circle down through it. I'm running late and haul ass towards the airport. Dump all the flaps and get slowed down for a nice touchdown and turn off.

A little excitement to start the day.

That was FUN!!!!

CAVU

This is the kind of day we are having here. It's not my picture, but I didn't have a camera with me this morning.

I got the new starter installed in the plane on Saturday. It was a royal pain. Of course it just didn't bolt in like the old one. It's finally in and it ROCKS!! I also installed the new igntion switch and door lock so all the keys match now. Out of all of it, the door lock was the worst, but it's done.

I flew to work today and it was CAVU. Ceiling And Visibility Unlimited. When I took off, the sun was just starting to rise, and you could see that the cars still had their lights on, a little fog in the valleys, and I could see the tall buildings in Charlotte as the sun rose. That's over 60 miles away!

There was a little wind, but not too bad. Not a cloud in the sky, and I had to turn off all the vents as it was a little cool. It is a perfect day to fly, and a perfect description of why I fly.

Friday

It's Friday! The best news, is that the airplane starter should be here today! I wasn't expecting it to be shipped until next Thursday at the earliest. Soooo I can put it in tonight and go flying tomorrow cause it's supposed to be nice all weekend.

I've made some friends on Blogger, and I read them every day, so it has inspired me to post some more. I'm not very expressive, and am not a very good writer, but I made this blog so I could post a response to a couple of others. Sometimes it's good to vent though.

Since I started posting comments on other sites, I've had over 130 views of my profile in the last few weeks (up from 5 for the last year)

I would link to other blogs, but I don't know how, and I would like to get a counter, but don't know how to do that either. I looked, but I haven't spent much time or figured it out. If it's simple, please let me know. If it's complicated, never mind. ;-)

October 4-6 is the Sonex gathering in Crossville, TN. I'll be flying the Cessna to this one since I have not finished my Sonex yet. Maybe next year.

I like the paint job (second one), but I've been struggling with ideas for my paint. I want something colorful, and I was going to primarily be yellow, but all the factory planes are now being painted yellow and I think there are too many. So I'll probably go with white, but I want some stripes and such, but am not artistic enough to come up with something cool. Since Dad was in the Flying Tigers (not as a pilot though), I thought about having shark teeth on the front, but don't want it too lame. The one at the top is not toooo lame, but borderline.

I Remember

I still have trouble seeing images of the World Trade Center without getting tears in my eyes.

A relative of mine was on Flight 175 and my heart goes out to her family and the rest of the families who have to deal with this on a daily basis, not just once a year like most of us.

I borrowed (stole) the image from Indian Chris at Right Wing & right Minded

Starters are out of stock!

It'll be at least the 18th before the new airplane starter comes. I'm pained about that. Still, I flew to work today in the Cessna 150 Taildragger. It's older, and doesn't fly quite as nice, but it has a whole lot more horsepower and moves right along. The disadvantage is that it uses a whole lot more gas. Oh well, that's the price you pay for commuting via the air.

What? Not everyone has 2 planes to fly? You probably have a spare car. Why not an airplane? It really isn't mine, my partner in the 152 owns this one and it doesn't get flown a whole lot. So I can fly it just about any time I want. Besides it was low on gas and somebody had to fill it up.

Bad Day

Well, as both of you know (those that might stumble upon this blog every so often), I've been flying to work most of the summer. I've flown every day this week, except for today. On Wednesday I thought I'd put on a show for the guys that are there drinking coffee every morning. I was going to land on the very end of the runway and turn off at the first turn off (which is not impossible, but almost). I was coming in very slow and sinking pretty fast, but hit my mark exactly where I wanted to. That's where the problem came in. My main wheels touched down where I wanted them to, but the tailwheel was still in the grass. When it hit the edge of the pavement, it launched the nose of the plane and it looked like I was playing hopscotch with the plane.... I'm sure it didn't look as bad to them as it did me as I was dancing all over the rudder pedals to get 'er calmed down.

They rated the landing at a 6, but they were way too kind, I rated it as a 4. Murphy must have a law that the quality of the landing is inversely proportional to the number of people watching!

So yesterday I hit right at the spot where I wanted to turn off yesterday and turned off at the second spot (same distance, but not as cool). Landing was an 8.8.
Got to the airport at about 5 to go home and the starter took a big dump. NOW WHAT!!??
I got someone to hold the brakes while I tried to hand prop it. I couldn't believe that what I see in the movies is NOT TRUE!!! I struggled for a while and got someone to help me push it to the maintenace hangar. Fortunately the guy who works there was still there. We did some troubleshooting and I decided to get a new starter relay and that would fix it. Went and got one, but it didn't work.

Tried a few more things and decided to try propping it again. After about a half hour of straining in 95 degree heat, it actually started. I'm ordering a new high power starter today. ($450, ouch!!) Still, it was an adventure!! At least I know it'll prop start now, and with some of the info I learned, it won't take as long if I ever need to do it again.

I fly to work

Don't read that as I fly for work... I just commute to work in an airplane. Not all the time, but so far this summer about 2-3 times a week.
I live 50 miles away by car, and it takes 55 minutes. When I fly, it takes about an hour and 10 minutes. WTF? That's from door to door.
10 minutes to Gene's, 10 minutes to preflight the plane, 35 min to warm it up, taxi, take off and land (depending on the wind), 5 minutes to tie it down and 10 minutes to work.
Do I mind? How can you mind, no traffic, speeding by the little cars down there, the freedom of flight and of course the "Cool Factor"! The cool factor is slightly diminished by having to bum a ride to work and back, but is somehow also raised by who picks me up and drops me off.

Besides the plane started life as a Cessna 152 Commuter, so even though it is now a Texas Taildragger, it's my commuter. As the days get shorter, my commuting ability will change.

So, since tomorrow is a teacher work day, I might take it off too. The question now becomes, "Where should I fly?"

Texas Taildragger

I'm flying all over the place this summer. I will be getting back to work on the Sonex pretty soon as the 152 will move to another place for a while. Ervin will be using it to finish his training for his private pilot's license.

It's been fun, but expensive at $4.60 + a gallon for avgas. Oh well. I have about 400 hours and over 25% of them are tailwheel hours now. The Sonex will run on car gas and about the same number of gallons per hour although it runs 170 instead of 105 or so.

I feel special even though at work I feel like a big fuckin loser! It seems our district doesn't want old men as school administrators.

"L"

I haven't posted in a while...3 months to be a little more exact. Like many other people, I just enjoy reading other's blogs, and don't feel like trying to be silly or witty or whatever.
Besides. Nobody reads this crap anyway. I just started it so I could post a comment or two on some other blogs.

I feel like a loser. I interviewed for the best job in the whole world (at least my world...and the best job for me) and I didn't get it. I made the final 3, which should make me feel good about it since I didn't even make the second round in the school district where I work now.
Sooooo, I'm bummed. Really bummed.

I should be thankful I have a job, and I am, but it is time for me to move on.

Oil Companies are Crooks!

7 weeks ago, gas was $1.78 a gallon in Spartanburg. Today it is $2.35 a gallon.
The gas is not the winter blend anymore, which should make it cheaper AAAANNNNDDDD the price of crude has gone down! So gas at the pump should be cheaper. IT'S NOT!

When I'm King, things will be different. I'm going to find out why the crooks running the oil companies think they have a license to screw the American public.

They will have to be executed. They are crooks, which make them criminals and criminals have to die.

I'm pissed. I'd be even more pissed if my car didn't get 80 mpg.

I didn't win the 240 Million

I'm somewhat bummed about not winning the lottery. I'm here at work, and I'd much rather be retired. Guess I won't be able to give away any money now.

I took my School Leaders License Assessment a week and a half ago. Guess that means 2-1/2 weeks until I find out how I did.

Not much to blog about, but I thought I should write something....Oh yeah! Some scumbag on ebay suckered me for $400 for Daytona 500 tickets. I spoke with the detective today, and I hope he (the guy, not the detective) gets ass raped in prison. There are about 25-28 of us scam-ees...one guy for $2800.

This shirt is fitting...

The detective said he didn't think the guy was too bright scamming a bunch of NASCAR fans out of race tickets. I wouldn't be surprised if the guy was taken care of before they could arrest him.